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The BIZremedies blog
Oct 19
2009

Who is counseling/psychotherapy for? Why go to therapy?

Posted by Diane Garrison in therapy , teamwork , spiritual , self-discovery , psychotherapy , mind , depression , counseling , collaboration , anxiety , abuse

Diane Garrison

Therapy is not for crazy people.  Therapy is to stop you from going crazy.  It is for anyone who is struggling with a difficult or painful life issue that is overwhleming them.  It is certainly for people experiencing significant depression or anxiety issues, alcohol or drug abuse problems, anger management problems, trauma issues, school or work performance problems, chronic relationship conflicts, or grief/loss issues.  These are common human experiences that can overwhelm people.  However, therapy is also for anyone who would like to build a positive relationship with themselves, who desires to actualize their potential in any or all areas of life, e.g. therapy is for folks who want to become their best selves. 

We are all imperfect perfect people, raised in an imperfect world.  Because of this fact, we develop negative mental, behavioral, and/or emotional habits which block us from being the people we are truly meant to be.  Psychotherapy can help people dissolve those blocks and achieve the health, life satisfaction and feeling of productivity and purpose we all deserve.    Therapy is a collaborative process where the therapist guides the client to face the psychological wounds or stuck pIaces and then assists them to utilize their strengths and healthy coping skills to heal or transform these blocks.  The therapist doesn’t fix the client, but guides and mentors the client to develop or strengthen skills they can use for the rest of their lives.  It is teamwork.  It is collaboration.  It is healing through relationship.

 

As humans, we are complex creatures who require health of mind (our thinking/feeling self), body (our physical organic self) and spirit (soul/higher self) to truly thrive.  If we do not understand each of these parts of the self and/or do not know how to care for our mental, physical or spiritual self, then we expereince ‘dis – ease’.   Stress and negative thinking can lead to anxiety, but it can also cause insomnia, ulcers, headaches and a whole host of other physical problems.  Abusing alcohol can lead to depression and a list of physical problems, but can also lead a person to feel spiritually bankrupt—“I don’t know who I am any more”.   The therapist’s job is to teach the client how to take care of all three aspects of self so that they can truly experience total well-being and personal satisfaction.  Therefore, therapy is also for anyone who is struggling with health of body (chronic pain, irritable bowel syndrome, migraines), mind (chronic worrier, chronic indecisiveness, self-critical, perfectionistic) or spirit (loss of faith, feel out of touch with your core values, loss of self-worth).  Therapy is a process of self-discovery, skill building, habit transformation and personal empowerment.

 

Well if therapy is so wonderful, why do most people avoid it like the plague?  One reason is the sterotype that therapy is for crazy people. You don’t go to therapy unless you are a real mess. Some marketing wise therapists have renamed themselves “life coaches”, to lessen the stigma, but still few people take advantage this empowering process.  Certainly some folks lack the resources (insurance, cash flow) to take advantage of this service.  But I think the biggest reasons are cultural.  We are a society that looks for quick fixes and therapy takes a lot of time and effort.  We are a society that likes to buy instant happiness (the next coolest electornic toy) and therapy is a process of self-discovery that in time can lead to happiness.  We are a culture that keeps ourselves so busy and so connected to electronic devices we are forgetting about the healing component of face to face open, honest communication.  Finally, we are an independent minded people who often believe that we must figure out all our problems on our own, or else consider ourselves weak.   It is funny, that we are ususally willing to assist others who ask us for help, yet is so difficult to ask for help for ourselves.   Instead, we will just look up our problem on the internet, find too much information (some of it conflicting), get overwhelmed and just avoid the whole mess.           

 

As a psychologist I am well aware that I am biased in favor of therapy for anyone seeking personal growth?  I would love to hear from others why people don’t utilize therapy very often.

 

Diane C. Garrison, Ph.D.

Lake Country Counseling Services

Oct 15
2009

Be More Effective: Practice the Attitude of Gratitude

Posted by Susan K. Wehrley in motivate , manager , leadership , holidays , gratitude , efficient , effective , consultant , business , attitude

Susan K. Wehrley

With the holidays around the corner, it is the time of year where we are more apt to focus on thanksgiving and gratitude. Much has been written about the power of gratitude and how it helps us to manifest our goals, both at work and at home, so let’s take some time now to understand how this works.

 

Here are just a few things said about gratitude:

 

Feeling grateful or appreciative of someone or something in your life actually attracts more of the things that you appreciate and value into your life. Christiane Northrup 

What if you gave someone a gift, and they neglected to thank you for it - would you be likely to give them another? Life is the same way. In order to attract more of the blessings that life has to offer, you must truly appreciate what you already have. Ralph Marston  

Deficiency motivation doesn't work. It will lead to a life-long pursuit of try to fix me. Learn to appreciate what you have and where and who you are. Wayne Dyer  

Why does expressing gratitude work to motivate and inspire others?  When we focus on gratitude we are focusing on what is happening that we like. We are saying in effect: “Yes!  You got the ball in the net…I want more of that!”  This kind of positive reinforcement helps people to understand what you want and reminds them how good it feels to be praised. Many people, in contrast, work from the “not goal” and only express their disappointment when they are not getting what they want. Don’t get me wrong, being specific about this can be helpful too, when given in smaller proportions to the praise technique of gratitude. The reason praise and gratitude works better is that people begin to see themselves doing it right. When continual disappointment is expressed people actually see themselves as “not enough” and perform out of that vision of themselves.
Do you use gratitude to motivate or criticism? Which do you think works best and why?

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