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Dec 26
2009

Take Her Out for Ice Cream!

Posted by Rick Schaefer in Untagged 

Rick Schaefer

I know this is more of a business related site, but it being the holidays, and the holidays being so much about family, i wanted to share a tip on parenting.  I personally really like this one!

I was recently asked a question relating to a teenager having her third car accident, and how a parent might have an influence on guiding the child to better outcomes.  Here's my response: 

    That’s a good question.  You could force her to study safe driving techniques before allowing her to have a car again.  You could scold her and take away her driving privileges altogether.  You could send her to a driving school and make her pay for it.  You could make her pay for any increases in insurance premiums you incur.  Or, you could take her out for ice cream and show her you love her.

    The biggest thing here is not that your daughter learns something, but that you have a tremendous opportunity for growth yourself.  If you handle this well, you will have really lovely memories of this event.

    I believe that she is well aware that she screwed up, that she needs to focus more when driving, and that there are certain costs associated with having accidents.  These concepts are best discussed when she is desiring to and brings it up at a later date.

    I think what she would like to know in this moment more than anything else is that you love her, you accept her, and that she can feel safe in coming to you and sharing with you what is going on in her life, regardless of the intimacy or the embarrassment of it.

    You have a chance to build tremendous trust and love with your daughter in this moment, so go hug her, love her, laugh with her, and take her for ice cream!

                                                            Enjoy, Rick 

Dec 21
2009

An LOA Perspective on Contract Law and Other Foolishness

Posted by Rick Schaefer in negotiation , loa , life coaching , law of attraction , doctor

Rick Schaefer
What is the Law of Attraction perspective on legal contracts?  Everything about signing a contract revolves around the phrase “we agree to agree.”  If you look at any contract that phrase is basically contained in the first paragraph, and essentially means that if the two parties agree, there is really no need for a contract.  Well I’d like to show you that there is never any need for a contract.
So, the first paragraph contains the concept “we agree to agree.”  The remaining 99 paragraphs contain the concept “here’s what we will do if we disagree.”  That’s the part the lawyers get paid to write.  Consider this concept deeper:  planning what you will do if you disagree in essence means that when you wrote the contract you “agreed” what to do if you disagree in the future.  Well, that makes absolutely no sense at all.  Whatever makes you believe that if you truly do not agree at some point in the future, why would you abide by what you “agreed” to do if you don’t agree.  If you don’t agree, you will have no incentive to agree, now will you?
So why waste any of your time or money agreeing to what you will do if you someday don’t agree, which of course you will not agree to do what you previously agreed to anyway, because you don’t agree!
If you have studied the law of attraction, you probably have come to believe that what you focus your attention upon expands, and thus the contract has actually the opposite effect than what you might first think.  The attorney will tell you that the contract will prevent conflict and disagreement.  The law of attraction states that if you focus on what to do if there is a conflict or disagreement, the likelihood of a conflict or disagreement significantly increases.
I suggest you save your time, save your money, and avoid the contract altogether.  go back to the one timeless solution that far outweighs the contract:  the simple handshake.  The physical contact between two human beings that symbolizes respect and love for one another.
We all share this planet, and deep down we all know that we want to get along, and “play nice” like our mothers told us growing up.  We also know on a very deep level that there are enough resources for all of us to thrive, and all at the same time.  So let’s get on with it!

Dec 17
2009

The Coming New Year!

Posted by Susan K. Wehrley in profitable , new year , moore oil , management , leadership , growing , economy , curiosity , company , business , baptistas , andis

Susan K. Wehrley

The Coming New Year


By: Susan K. Wehrley, with quotes from BIZremedies' Members, Andis Company, Baptista's & Moore Oil

With the coming of the New Year and a whole new decade around the corner, most of us are wondering how to make it a better year financially, emotionally, physically, relationally and spiritually.


The Power of Curiosity helps us to uncover hidden possibilities we otherwise cannot imagine when we are stuck in the static condition of our minds and the preconceived notions we hold regarding the world around us.  During difficult economic times, it’s easy for companies and individuals to have foggy thinking and assume their business and their personal lives should be suffering like most appear to be. However, this thinking is limiting, instead of asking ourselves, “How might I still be prosperous in this recession?” A company who has taken this curious approach who has worked with Organizational Development Consultant, Susan K. Wehrley, is Andis Company. Andis' Executive Vice President, Matt Andis, says "We tend to get mired down in routines and fail to really look at all areas of opportunities.  As we move through our goals and planning stages it is widely encouraged to be curious and ask those tough and maybe taboo questions, questions that we may typically shy away from.  This curious form of "Ask-Leading" has pushed us to a higher level in all aspects of our demanding business." A mere question of “How might I make this a more prosperous year?” or “How might I enjoy life more and still be successful?” or “How might I enjoy more connected relationships?” can bring us ways of thinking we never had before.

 
So if it is so simple, why do we resist being curious?  Being curious leads us to the unknown for a while until we are able to obtain the awareness and information we desire. This mid-way place can be scary, as it requires humility.  We have to believe that we do not know it all if we’re to be open to discovering that which is still foreign to us. For instance Moore Oil Company recognized they didn’t know it all when they had their company take a formal online assessment. COO of Moore Oil, Andrew Haag, says assessments are "beneficial because it's good to get curious about what my employees think about strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats for the company before setting goals. This way input is considered and they have a sense of buy-in to the direction of the company."  Living with a curious mind allows us to realize that the more we know the more we have to learn.  When we live with a curious mind, we no longer feel shame about not knowing certain things or understanding them only with hindsight.  We realize that even though we have reached a certain level of wisdom, we will continue to discover truth and learn more through our life experiences.  Nan Gardetto, Owner of Baptista's Bakery, has recognized the importance of continuous learning and curiosity and says, "I believe curiosity is paramount to being successful.  One way we use curiosity in our annual strategic planning is to get curious and ask our customers what their own goals are for the coming New Year and how our company might help in achieving them.  By being curious, and not assuming we know what our customer needs, we have a better chance of offering up effective solutions and aligning our own goals with the needs of our customers." Therefore, instead of feeling shame about discovering something we did not know, we can say to ourselves, “Of course I didn’t know, I am always curious and learning!”

Apply this technique to all aspects of your life:
1. Relationships—what makes them tick?  What gets them ticked off?
2. Business Strategies—what works?  What doesn’t?
3. Yourself—why do you say you want something but don’t follow-through?
4. What does your heart and soul believe it needs to accomplish this year?
5. How can you let go of mere activity and busyness?

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